Heartbeat

WARNING: This poem is not for the faint of heart.

In the early 1980’s, when I was in Junior High, I witnessed an abortion on PBS while at home. They used a type of ultrasound that revealed a full skeleton of a baby, and its movements and actions could be clearly seen. What I saw struck me so deeply I immediately wrote a poem about it, relating the baby’s movements and what I believe the baby experienced from his or her point of view. As I watched the abortion, it was obvious to me that the baby knew he/she was under attack. Everything I describe in this poem is exactly what the baby did. This is not the original poem. While in college, it was lent to a friend and subsequently lost. Unable to recover the original, I’ve rewritten the memory that will forever be seared in my mind.

HEARTBEAT

Oh, my mommy!

I can’t wait to meet!

I get so excited

I kick my feet

And my daddy

I can hear your voice

Its deep soothing rumble

Daddy, you are my choice!

The steady cadence

Of Mommy’s heartbeat

Rocks me and warms me

Gently to sleep

But to unrest I awaken

What is this I hear?

The voices of clamor

I shed my first tear

I’m awash in pain

But I still find my thumb

This burn won’t stop

So, I try to run

With no place to go

I suck a little faster

Seeking the comfort

Of your familiar laughter

On this new day

Your heartbeats race

But against mine

They don’t match the pace

My warm home trembles

A monster invades!

I yank my feet up

To avoid the blades

I cry for Mommy

I reach my arms out

The beast has my leg

No one hears my shout

It hurts and tears at me

So I grasp in dismay

But it’s all for not, and

Death carries me away…

On an eternal Heartbeat

Out of reach and safe

Into warmth and comfort

Held in Heaven’s embrace

By Sandi Rog

December 2016